I thought the other day about how excited I am about baseball season starting (if you are unlucky enough to be involved in my fantasy league and have received multiple emails from me inviting you to join you know what I am talking about).
I thought perhaps that I am more excited this year than I have been in years past. Then I took the time to look back through the archieves of my Myspace blog (certainly an interesting trip, try it) and realized that this time last year, and the year before that, I said literally the exact same things. I read some stuff that I wrote in February of last year (’08) and I could honestly not tell you if I wrote it a year ago or last week. Eerie.
I don’t know what it is about this sport, or spring training. Like I said I was reading my Myspace blog (www.myspace.com/terrygilmore1) and I realized that the seasonal depression, the anxiety, I felt the exact same things a year ago, exactly. I felt good in December, and progressively worse through January and into February until about this time, when the weather starts to get better and baseball starts. And I think I figured it out. There is a psychological thing going on here. My brain goes into hibernation in January and February, I am emotionally shut down by the weather and lack of sunlight, and start to feel anxiety (which I have recently)until the weather starts to break when I start to come out of it.
Spring training happens to coincide with this psychological cycle I am trapped in, so my brain sees spring training as the light at the end of its depressed, anxious tunnel. Pretty cool isnt it? I figured that all out on my own through a little self reflection and by reading back through what I have journaled the last few years.
Know Thy Self I guess.